Manners Maketh Man

American Mahjongg is a pretty complicated game to learn with all its rules and nuances. And it usually takes a long time of playing before one begins to master the game. But one thing that many teachers do not teach, or that players do not learn about, is mahjong etiquette. Just as league rules vs house rules seems to always spark debate, etiquette does not disappoint.

It may not seem so obvious to you why one should follow a little ‘mahjong etiquette’ until someone reaches over and grabs your joker from beneath your eyes.

Are you sitting down? Here’s a non exhaustive list of game play etiquette, but more importantly the why we should be following it. I strongly suggest you let your guard down right now, give up the ‘I don’t do that’ attitude and be open to some suggestions …

1.     Discuss cell phone rules for the table ahead of time.

Why? Everyone has a different opinion here. There’s no right or wrong. Knowing what everyone is comfortable with ahead of time will save you from lots of bar-fight brawls and animosity. Read the room. If you join a table that plays with no-phones-at-the-table rule, then respect it.

2.     Do not touch other player’s tiles, EVER.  In the event of a joker exchange, politely ask to swap tiles.

Why? Besides it being common courtesy, it can easily be misconstrued as someone trying to cheat.  Also, if you place an incorrect tile in someone’s hand, they are the ones who get penalized and their hand could be called dead because of your mistake.

3.     Do not talk about another player’s hands, or game play. Do not point out their jokers, etc.

E.g.; “I know what you’re going for” “She’s one away from winning” “Oh-oh, she threw down a joker”

Why? It is up to each player to be on the lookout and play for themselves. Also, most players do not appreciate info being shared that could compromise their game.

4.     There should be no running commentary about the tiles you picked, or your hand in general.

Why? No one really cares. I know that's hard to hear. It’s distracting. And also, you are giving away key information.

5.     Do not tell other’s how to play unless it is a ‘teachable moment’ and all players agree to this.

Why? All players have their own style of play. Just because it’s different, doesn’t mean it’s wrong. Discuss rules before game begins. Also, player’s like to feel they won on their own, without your help. No need for mahjong police here.

6.     When tiles are passed out during the ‘dealing’ process, it is courteous to wait until everyone has their tiles before looking at yours.

Why? It makes it much easier to keep track of dealt tiles, especially when having to push out another wall.

7.     After a tile has been discarded, allow a couple of seconds to pass before you pick up your tile from the wall and place it in your rack. Yes, you should always rack, but the whole process need not be at lightning speed.

Why? To allow for players to call the last discard. Some players need a bit more time to register the last call (especially newer players).

8.     Keep your hands off the table and out of the game when it’s not your turn. Do not arrange tiles after each play.

Why? This game require focus, and it can be very distracting to others. It avoids any possible cheating as well.

9.     During the Charleston, try to pass at the same time.

Why? Simple… to avoid confusion.

10.  Do not stand behind others (if you are rotating players) and talk.

Why? It may appear as cheating. It is distracting and rude.

11. Be in tune with everyone’s needs; some require less chatter to be able to concentrate. Some require slowing down the game.

Why? Common courtesy

12.  Be cool about your loss and move on. Also, no whining about your crappy hand.

Why? No one wants to hear you complain. Keep the game happy and congratulate the winner.

13.  Allow the winner to expose their mahjong and congratulate them. No need to show or discuss your hand.

Why? For one, the table needs to make sure it’s an official win. Winning feels good, so let that player bask in their glory. Unless you are in the learning phase, discussing hands after a win slows down game play. Throw your tiles in and ‘quickly’ start again!

14. Help set up and pack up the game. Participate in the ‘washing’ (mixing) of the tiles.

Why? It should not be left up to one person to do it alone. This game is a social game. All parts of the game should be done as a team. It simply isn’t fair to assume that you shouldn’t take part.

Hope that I haven’t offended anyone and, if you recognize yourself doing any of these less than favorable behaviors, then there’s no time like the present to come clean. Have an etiquette suggestion to add to the list? Feel free to comment at the bottom.